Remember Bucky from American idol season 6? He came in 4th back in 2006.I met him when he was visiting the childrens hospital where my son was born.
I consider myself somewhat of an authority on American idol. I have watched every episode in the last 9 years, yep every single one. I love Simon Cowell. I think he's a genius, the show is super entertaining however this last season finale was entertaining for a number of different reasons. It was weird, very weird, very very weird!
After 7 citys, 100,000 dreams, 14 weeks of live performances, 500 million votes and this is what we ended up with...
Alice Cooper opened the show. What did we do to deserve this? Oh well it can only get better right?
Chris Allen the reigning American idol sang. Remember him? No, I didn't either. Cast your mind back, he was the guy who beat Adam Lambert last year in the shock finale. He was OK and less scary than Alice Cooper.
Then we were reminded about some of the worst auditions of the season - probably the highlight of the show. How ironic that the worst ended up being the best.
Then the Bee Gees showed up, their pants super baggy but their faces quite tight. Lord, how much work have they had done?
Then the annual appearance from David Hasslehoff sitting in the audience clapping. How does he get a ticket to the finale every year is what I wanna know....???
Michael McDonald was introduced and sang. Now, I admit that I am not his biggest fan however I thought that I would be able to pick him out of a line up if I had to. Well, apparently NOT. The man has had so much plastic surgery that he didn't even look like him. Not even a strange, younger or even cat like version of himself but..... not like him at all. In fact, I don't think it was him. Channel 5 are having a laugh at us viewers and sticking some random man who can sing like him up there and wondering if we would notice. Well, Fox 5, I did notice!
Then there was a man who made a song up about Simons insults. I'm just glad that Simon was not asked to judge him. It was, as us English would say...... RUBBISH. It was truly awful. It didn't rhyme, the man couldn't sing. Was this funny and I just didn't get it? as if that wasn't bad enough the biggest bunch of crazy past contestants came out on stage jumping around. Who let them out of the asylum? It was chaos on stage. Quite disturbing actually.
Some of the runner ups sang (out of tune) to a difficult Christina Aguilera song. Then out she popped up on stage putting them all to shame because she CAN sing, wearing sparkly tights and not much else but when you're that skinny you can get away with it I suppose.
Then came Daryl Hall and John Oates, big whoop, didn't recognize them either!
Crystal sang an Alanis Morissette song and changed the lyrics because of course they are too offensive for prime time. Alanis is a bad ass and has obviously been giving lessons to our once wholesome idol Carrie Underwood. Carrie appeared in the same black leather leggings and thigh high boots Alanis was wearing, singing a rather angry sounding song.
For the love of God would someone put her back in a flowery dress and some cowboy boots!Then as if I wasn't confused enough already....
Casey James (the seasons eye candy) was joined by Brett Michaels who, only last month doctors discovered that he had suffered a massive sub arachnoid hemorrhage. He was in critical condition in ICU. Less than a month later he looked the healthiest person I've seen on stage tonight. Strange!
Ryan announces idol is joining 'my space' online. my space? really? anyone remember my space? What the hell is going on?
The idol classic song "pants on the ground" was so jazzed up, it was virtually unrecognizable. They should have left the song just as it was. That's the way we all liked it, stick to the original people! As Randy would say: the arrangement was all wrong!
Then came Paula. Everyone was so happy to see her. We've missed you Paula! and then she started talking. She made some jokes, at least I think they were jokes, I have no idea what she was going on about. Some things never change!
Joe Cocker performed. Gosh, he looked in pain and I was so glad when he finished his performance as I swear that he was about to have a massive coronary or something.
All the previous American idols gathered and sang, no suprise there. I knew that would happen. Didn't Kelly Clarkson get chunky? but at least I recognized her!
Now lets get to the last performer of the night. Last but by no means least, Janet Jackson. Janet's had her share of weight issues. Shes been every thing from slender and fit to fat and flabby but this year she is the strangest shape. Very slim with an enormous Kardashian bottom. Gosh, has there been some enhancement there or what?
The last 5 minutes of the show is the announcement we've all been waiting for. The lights dim, drum roll please......... Ryan pauses for what seems like hours and in true idol fashion the underdog wins, the confetti falls, the winner cries and then sings so badly that we wonder how the hell they got to win.
I can't help but wonder if the finale this year is truly the finale of idol. Its the end of an era. Will any one watch next season with Simon gone? Didn't we only want to hear what came out of Simons mouth and not any one elses? This was the strangest season finale ever, of any show I've ever seen. I'm sure Simon wanted to shout
"I don't want to be rude but this is complete and utter rubbish!!!"